It’s close 12:00 am and my nose is still stuck in a book. I know that I should be asleep, my eyes say “last page”, my mind say’s “just one more page”. Typically I’m in bed and deep into my slumber by this time of night. I had told myself that I would no longer stay up so late, it’s just not good for me and diminishes any hope of experiencing any productive thoughts the next day. But I was drawn into the text, another few pages and I would turn out the light.
There was a divine plan in my eagerness to devour this book and stay up past my bedtime, I just didn’t know it yet.
As if the day goes on forever, a child comes waltzing in and begins a long discussion about something. I only hear half of what is said as I try to read and nod my head at just the right times so I look as if I was absorbing every word. Right on cue; I say what every mother says to her child at the midnight hour; “shouldn’t you be getting to bed soon.” Of course I’m concerned about the child’s needed sleep, but I was really more concerned about finishing the chapter. Shame on me. With my bedside vacant once more, I snuggle up and return to my book.
The heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure. Who can understand it? Jeremiah 17:9
A page turns and minutes have passed, I feel a presence coming close to me, a quite step, a hushed word…Mom, can we talk? The momma bear in me is awakened, no other words are needed, I rise up and quietly escort my child from my room so that Dad is not disturbed. Two steps into the next room…child turns to me with a tearful confession that “they feel so far from God”. My heart breaks and what can only be accredited to divine wisdom, I respond; “honey, God’s not far from you”. For twenty minutes a sweet little soul is cleansed with what seemed like a mountain of confessions. I’m listening now with all of my heart. But as I listen all I can do is praise God for this amazing gifts He has given me. The gift of this child, being a mother, answering this call of need, loving the opportunity be a vessel for my child to fill with confessions. I give each one to God and hold my child and pray. This night my heart is filled with joy as my child’s heart is cleansed of deceit and opened to receive God’s divine grace.
“I the Lord search the heart and examine the mind”, to reward a man according to his conduct, according to what his deeds deserve. Jeremiah 17:10
As the Lord examines my child’s heart and mind, I realize that the recent conduct that was confessed will not reap great rewards. However, with God’s amazing love He can restore my child’s heart. With God’s Word, the mind will be renewed. In the dark we stand embraced and I reassure my child that God will bring peace and heal the wounds of sin. I am humbled and honored to be a mother, I am lifted and encouraged by God’s faithful promises.
Heavenly Father thank you for trusting me with your child, for giving me the gift of motherhood, for the wisdom you placed in my heart, for holding my tongue when my child needed me to listen, for opening my heart to receive, for giving me discernment, patience and unconditional love, and for directing my child to come and talk to me. Father God I pray for those who don’t know you or have chosen not raise their children in your Word. Father, in your Son’s name I pray that you stir their hearts, to pull them into your ways so their children learn about you in their home, giving them a safe haven to share their heart, confess their sins and receive your forgiveness. Amen
Cindi
Sixty-six books in a year 