In one hand, he holds the sweetness of memory. In the other hand, he holds his current anguish.
“I long for the years gone by
when God took care of me,
3 when he lit up the way before me
and I walked safely through the darkness.
4 When I was in my prime,
God’s friendship was felt in my home.
5 The Almighty was still with me,
and my children were around me.
6 My steps were awash in cream,
and the rocks gushed olive oil for me. (Job 29:2-6, NLT)
Job compares his good days to his current days, and it serves to intensify his misery, his isolation, his loneliness, his worth.
“And now they mock me with vulgar songs!
They taunt me!
10 They despise me and won’t come near me,
except to spit in my face.
11 For God has cut my bowstring.
He has humbled me,
so they have thrown off all restraint.
12 These outcasts oppose me to my face.
They send me sprawling
and lay traps in my path.
13 They block my road
and do everything they can to destroy me.
They know I have no one to help me.
14 They come at me from all directions.
They jump on me when I am down.
15 I live in terror now.
My honor has blown away in the wind,
and my prosperity has vanished like a cloud.
16 “And now my life seeps away.
Depression haunts my days.
17 At night my bones are filled with pain,
which gnaws at me relentlessly.
18 With a strong hand, God grabs my shirt.
He grips me by the collar of my coat.
19 He has thrown me into the mud.
I’m nothing more than dust and ashes.
20 “I cry to you, O God, but you don’t answer.
I stand before you, but you don’t even look.
21 You have become cruel toward me.
You use your power to persecute me.
22 You throw me into the whirlwind
and destroy me in the storm.
23 And I know you are sending me to my death—
the destination of all who live. (Job 30:9-23, NLT)
The power of words. The power of what (he) tells (himself–and tells others). The replaying of words and wounds tightens the bond of the weight. Oh, deceitful tongue.
1 I took my troubles to the Lord;
I cried out to him, and he answered my prayer.
2 Rescue me, O Lord, from liars
and from all deceitful people.
3 O deceptive tongue, what will God do to you?
How will he increase your punishment?
4 You will be pierced with sharp arrows
and burned with glowing coals. (Psalm 120:1-4, NLT)
Lord, help me to be mindful of my words and my thoughts. Help me to take my troubles to you and trust that you hold all things together.