“I waited patiently for the Lord; he turned to me and heard my cry. He lifted me out of the slimy pit, out of the mud and mire; he set my feet on a rock and gave me a firm place to stand. He put a new song in my mouth, a hymn of praise to our God. Many will see and fear the Lord and put their trust in him.”Psalms 40:1-3 NIV
Do you ever wonder how you would grieve?
I do all the time. I have had the honor of walking with people as they have faced their own mortality and death and I’ve walked with families as they have faced the death of a loved one. Every single person has faced that time differently.
The words from Psalm 40 above were written by King David. He knew grief!! He knew the grief of death, of injustice, of sin, and of unmet desires and dreams. He intimately knew grief AND he penned the words of so many Psalms. He continued to rejoice in the midst of grief.
This is where my questioning comes in. Will I be able to worship and trust my God in the face of grief? Will I be able to see God and His character and trust Him? Will I allow Him to comfort me in my grief? Will I blame Him? Will I be faithful?
In all my questions…what I see is a desire for an intimate connection with God. King David had that kind of relationship with God. He was bold in telling God what he felt and believed no matter how heavy and full of doubts. David asked God A LOT of questions. The questions themselves are not wrong. The actions taken coming out of the questions can be helpful or hurtful.
David made both helpful and hurtful decisions. Let’s learn from David on how to hold space for both the grief and joy; sorrow and contentment; confusion and hope. Ultimately, it is our God that empowers us and moves in us to turn sorrow into rejoicing. I do not have the will power to do that on my own. I can, however, walk boldly knowing that God will give me what I need, when I need it to continue growing into the woman He created me to be.
Dear God, may we rest in the knowledge that it is You and Your work in us that allows us to live in the dual space of Grief and Joy. There is no perfect way to grieve. What you ask is for is us to come to you and receive comfort and peace and joy. Help us, God, to trust that you will do your work. Prepare my heat, lord. Amen