When Jesus called me, He called all of me. It all began when I was 12 years old and when I was 14, I completely surrendered to Him. I wanted everything God had for me, I wanted nothing in the way between Him and I. I read the Bible everyday looking for ways to obey Him and follow Him just like Joshua did. Joshua became a role model for me for many years.
Long ago I promised the ancestors of Israel that I would give this land to their descendants. So be strong and brave! Be careful to do everything my servant Moses taught you. Never stop reading The Book of the Law[b] he gave you. Day and night you must think about what it says. If you obey it completely, you and Israel will be able to take this land. – Joshua 1:6-8 CEV
My first spiritual dry experience came soon after when I was 15. There was a long season of not praying and not reading my Bible – it seemed that everything that was relevant was not anymore. In my boredom one day, I picked up one of my dad’s books called, Martyrs Mirror. It has a historical record of all the martyrs who had died for their faith beginning with the apostles and those from the early church. Very early on in the book, probably the first five pages, I wept when I read of the passion of these early followers of Jesus and was ashamed that I had lost mine.
I remember to think about
the many things
you did
in years gone by.
Then I lift my hands in prayer,
because my soul is a desert,
thirsty for water from you. – Psalm 143:5-6 CEV
When I hit my knees to surrender myself, I gave Jesus my desires and my life. It was then that I realized that I had really given Him my all. It was never going to be my way, always His way and I realized that this was going to be the best adventure I could ever have. He had my life in the palm of His hand.
You cannot be my disciple unless you give away everything you own. – Luke 14:33
Father, You have never left me and You have walked with me in whatever circumstances I have been in. You have seen me ashamed for having nothing, seen me embarrassed for being so small and little among others who know much more than I. Yet, when I get on my knees before You, You make me feel like a giant, like I can do and accomplish anything because You walk with me. I may not be like others, but when I walk with You, You walk with me and I am all that I need to be because You have called me to be Your child. I love You for this and each new day is a day where I take Your hand and follow You. With a thankful heart.